Yes, this was the object in my dream. Strange that I would remember it so vividly. I opened it again, examining it closely. Nothing was there. The leather was soft and supple. Like it had been well used, but it looked brand new. What the heck, I took the few things I had in my old wallet and stuffed them in the new one. Funny, it didn't bulge like the old one did. That was nice. I shoved it back in my pocket and picked up the key to the bike, the jacket and helmet a moment later. Outfitted and ready, I went out to the garage and got on the bike and started it up.I made it to Wally World in quick time, traffic was light. I needed some groceries and now was a good time to shop. I picked up a cart from Old Sam the greeter. He must have been 80 if he was a day. It'd be interesting to see him try to stop a shoplifter. He'd get hurt, bad. But he was nice and I'd talk with him on occasion. But not today. I cruised through the aisles picking up what I'd eat for the next week or so. When I. I haven’t felt that good in years!Defense Attorney: What happened next?Little Old Lady: Well, by then, I was feeling so “spicy” that I just laid down and told him “Take me, young man. Take me now!”Defense Attorney: Did he take you?Little Old Lady: Hell, no! He just yelled, “April Fool!” And that’s when I shot him, the little bastard.Short on compliments of joevsr‎2 men in a bar.1st man, turning to his buddy, “How can I start to grow hair on my bald head?”2nd man, “I have found that if you stick your head between a woman’s legs, It will help” Saying this as he stroked his full beard.The following are compliments of squaddie117‎Young Jewish couple are having their first baby, after the birth the Doctor comes to them and says, “you have a healthy baby boy, but I’m afraid he’s been born without eyelids.”“What can we do,” moaned the father, “He can’t go through life like that?”“Don’t worry,” said the Doctor, “When we perform the ‘Brit milah’ I’ll get my friend who’s a brilliant plastic.
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